thoughts thus far on poverty

Aside from all the exciting and amazing and beautiful creation i've been witness to here, it is definitely clear that it will be a little bittersweet here.

I don't think i thought about this very much until Steve (the head architect, and probably the older guy i identify most with, not to mention an old ag Whoop!) really tore out my foundations. I mean we are so indoctrinated and used to the way things are and how things are and should be and whatever.

I guess my point is that in the US we get all up in arms about poverty and about people living in horrible conditions and about how we shoudl help them and how we are going to be crusaders and save the universe and things. And i agree it is bad, and i woudln't want to live in the "poverty" that we have in america by any means. But i guess the thing though is that no matter how poor someone is in america, they can survive, they can get a job however mundane, however repetitive and low paying, and they can buy food, no matter how low in nutrients or how awful or dirty or poor they may actually be...it all pales in comparison to life here. If you are homeless in america you can make enough money panhandling to live, to eat, to move on to the next boring day perhaps, but still alive. And i'm sorry if i'm offending anyone here, and i dont mean to marginalize the extent of the problem in the US, but here it's so much worse.

Imagine you are six years old and live a block behind Gaba road (the road in town known for the furniture made and sold there) which is just chock full of muzungu's, rich westerners, people that have more money than they know what to do with. And you are dying of malaria. You are dying of a disease that is so common in your country that if you had six dollars for a pill to cure it you woudl be fine in three days. And yet you are dying and there is nothing your family can do about it. It is places like this where people actually die of starvation, not just go hungry, but die...I mean i know i knew that before, but i feel like over the course of this summer it will become more and more real to me.

I guess, however bad i think things are, however uncomfortable or distraught, or tired, or annoyed, or angry, or hopeless, or alone, or any condition under the sun...I still have nothing to complain about. Firstly because i have christ, and secondly because he blesses me with much more than i deserve, heck he blesses millions who live in america and dont know him while many who do know him here die in the streets. His ways are higher than our ways and his thoughts are higher than our thoughts, yet how precious are your thoughts of me O god, if i were to count them they woudl outnumber the sand...This applies to all of your beloved, including the downtrodden and forgotten.

i pray they take solace in that...